We are coming down to the wire, the last month of senior year, and I have never been quite as busy as I am now. I am swamped up to my ears in school work and I don’t know how I’m supposed to find my way out of this by the end of the year… although I’m sure it will all clear up and the many kinks and snares will smooth themselves out eventually. I suppose it’s just a very human thing for me to revel in my short-lived perils and bellyache over what has become a conflict for me instead of actively seeking a way in which to soothe all of my little scrapes and bruises myself.
You see that? I’m still making excuses for my poor managerial behavior.
You see, I tend to do this thing where I create a phantom structure for what I’m going to do after school, and it’s never really worked for me, but I do it anyway to make myself feel better about how poorly I make use of my valuable time. By phantom I mean that I will write down everything I have to do once school is over, sans actual planner book, and then once I’ve written it down, fully intending to keep the list and check off things as I finish them, I will simply lose that list among other items and forget all about it. I don’t forget the content, but as to why I still write it all down when I’ve already processed what I need to be doing is beyond me.
But… moving on…
Alas, I’m a tad bit excited, but I cannot decide over whether or not that it’s a good feeling of being excited or that nausea-inducing feeling that becomes a stomach turner the more unwelcome it is. This Independent Project, for instance, has made me feel energetic and springy, because the fiction book that I’ve chosen has consumed me for the last month or two, and the thought of sharing it is terrifyingly sensational. It’s such a disturbing read, but once you get into it, there’s no going back. It’s also interesting to think that there’s such a huge fan base for it all over the country (world?) and you could probably look into it for hours on end and still find new things to smile about and laugh at, and new things to haunt your dreams and make you do a double take.
Aside from the Independent Project, there’s much more that I should be doing but for which I haven’t really found the time. I’m still getting everything for college in order (it was official that I was going to UW weeks ago, so… if that’s news to anyone now, here you are). And I’m still trying to figure out how to be an adult on top of my focus on school. If I had something more academic to share, I would, but for now I’m going to save that for my next two blog posts will be posted one after the other. Look forward to that, I guess?
Hmmm… Not much else to say. Here’s a toast to my little reintroduction blog post?
Infinitesimal 
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